Diary of a Mom in College: Spontaneous Overflow of Powerful Emotions

 

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Disclaimer: this blog post is a diary entry and may include emotional outbursts!

The description of my feelings seems wordy but any fans of English Romanticism will totally get it. I am not necessarily having a Wordsworthian overflow, but I am having one all the same. Why? Well, because after being a college student for about 8 years (if you count the first few when I was only taking 1 class at a time), I am FINALLY a senior. After 2 years as a sophomore at Mt. SAC followed by 1 short year as a junior at Cal State Fullerton, I am looking forward and all I can see is the finish line. And you know what? It feels really, REALLY good. So good that I am doing all I can NOT to cry…NOT to bust out my pen and paper and write a poem that even Wordsworth would be impressed with!

I would like to say “I am almost done” but I truly know that I am done. Despite the fact that I have these last 2 semesters to conquer, I know I will conquer them and I know I will succeed. If you know me, or have known me for some time, you know that this confidence is something I have gained over the course of the last 3 years. I used to think that obtaining a degree was out of reach, that I was stupid, and that I just didn’t have what it took. Well, a message to my freshman self: you were wrong, Dianna! 

Looking back at the last 8 years of my life I have realized that I have overcome a lot more than I thought I have. But when I look back and see things like postpartum depression, anxiety, family issues, a sick spouse, pregnancy, raising children, overcoming a lack of confidence, struggling with subjects like math, etc. I realize that I have overcome a lot of difficulties that could have slowed me down, or stopped me in my tracks. But I kept going. You can keep going too.

You may have health issues (both physical and emotional). You may have a death in your family. You may go through a divorce. You may become a parent. You may lose your home, your job, your car. Whatever it is that you can lose, what you can’t lose is your education. Going to college is one of the best decisions I have ever made and I encourage each of you who is reading this to either continue striving for success in college or to take the chance and apply at your local community college. 

I am overwhelmed by the emotions I feel today but I am SO thankful for this experience in my life. But I did NOT do this alone. I am beyond grateful for the people who have impacted my life so deeply, who enabled me with confidence and courage. I especially want to thank Betsy McCormick, Jeanne-Marie V., Andrea Shaw, Linda Diaz, Dr. J, Marty Blaine, my husband David, my mom, my aunt Rhonda, my best friend Matt, and the deepest loves of my life: my children and my God. In 9 months when that degree is placed in my hands, it will be all of you who I will feel present in my heart! It is because of you that I am writing this today, heading into my final year as an undergrad!

Now let’s do this C/O 2015! 

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